I never thought I’d relate to Curly’s immortal line:
“I’m trying to think… but nothing happens.”
And yet… here we are.
Because lately, I’ve been doing a lot of thinking about thinking.
Which, as it turns out, is like trying to use your brain to explain your brain…
It’s a little like asking a dog to describe barking in French.
Now let’s be clear.
When I say I can’t think, I don’t mean I can’t reason, debate, or form a strong opinion. (Trust me… I’ve got those in bulk.)
No… my issue is recall.
You know… remembering things.
Like:
- Where I put my reading glasses five minutes ago
- Why I walked into the kitchen
- Or my personal favorite…
Looking for my car keys… while holding my car keys
I’m essentially running a full-scale search party for items already in custody.
So naturally, I decided to investigate.
What actually goes on when we think?
Apparently—and this is comforting—my brain is not broken.
It’s just… overachieving in all the wrong places.
Because inside my head is a Las Vegas light show:
⚡ 86 billion neurons firing
🔗 Chemical messages flying across synapses
🧪 Dopamine, serotonin, glutamate—basically a pharmaceutical convention
🧩 Entire regions of the brain collaborating like a corporate board meeting
And yet…
None of them can locate my glasses.
Let’s review.
The prefrontal cortex is handling decision-making.
The hippocampus is in charge of memory.
The amygdala is adding emotional spice to everything.
So theoretically, there’s a team of highly specialized professionals up there.
And collectively they’ve decided:
“Let’s remember a college lecture from 1983…
but absolutely lose track of the object currently on his face.”
Outstanding.
And then there’s this little gem:
Your brain is constantly predicting the future.
Predicting.
All the time.
It can anticipate:
- The end of a sentence
- A change in someone’s tone
- The exact moment an osprey is about to take flight
But it cannot predict where I just put down the TV remote.
Which brings me to these photos.
Because out there, standing in the wind and rain, camera in hand, watching an osprey…
Something remarkable happens.
All 86 billion neurons suddenly snap to attention like a military parade.
- The eyes lock in
- The brain calculates trajectory
- The body adjusts framing
- The finger hovers on the shutter
I’m anticipating… composing… feeling the moment before it happens.
It’s elegant.
It’s precise.
It’s borderline genius.
And then I get back in the car…
…and spend five minutes trying to remember where I put the lens cap.
So here’s my conclusion.
Thinking is:
Electrical signals + chemical reactions + predictive modeling + memory + experience…
All working together in perfect harmony…
Except when you need it for something practical.
And as for these osprey shots?
Yes… I’d love to tell you it was skill.
Timing.
A deep understanding of neuroscience.
But between you and me…
I’m pretty sure the osprey did most of the thinking.
I just happened to be there…
trying to remember where I parked.
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