We all do it.
Even when we’re alone.
Some like it better that way.
There’s no denying it.
Some even brag about it.
Some compare notes about it.
Would you believe some even rate their performance?
And they brag about it as if they’ve set a new standard for humankind.
I remember when being gentle and uninterrupted was what made it good.
Not anymore.
Metrics have been established for measurement of quality.
God help us.
Yes — speed. Length. Depth.
Are you kidding me?
Apparently, now it requires data.
Apps. Graphs. Charts. Percentages.
Some people wake up and immediately check their numbers.
“How’d you do last night?”
“Pretty strong. Solid duration. Hit my targets.”
Hit your targets?
Of course, we should get a good night’s sleep — but this borders on fanatical.
Unless, of course, you have OCD.
Then this is a godsend. Finally, a way to categorize slumber. Quantify it. Optimize it. Rank it against your neighbors.
I tell you what. I don’t give a hoot.
I’m going to be one of those party poopers who relies on that refreshed and renewed feeling I have after a good night’s sleep.
No dashboard required.
Sorry.
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